I can't do it.
I just cannot go.
My alarm went off moments ago,
I could not sleep last night--drifted off after 6 AM.
I'm a mess.
Shaky.
Still not well.
But more than anything,
I simply do not feel strong enough
to make it through that kind of....
Journey.
To sit in the car all the way to Llano
in a car with his family...
To go through the ritual of it all.
To bury another
of my young Friends.
I just cannot go.
I have called Kevin, left a message--
so they would not wait for me.
I am ashamed of myself.
But I just cannot do this.
I can't do it.
dont feel ashamed, babe. its not your fault Pestilence is trying to worm his way past your immune system. {hugs} youre ok.
Corvin