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Red Lipstick & Green Ink [userpic]

IwantedToKillmyselfLastNight....

May 20th, 2007 (01:45 pm)

AndThisMorning...

AndThroughMost

of
my
two
hours
shift.....Today.

One
of
the
Cooks
talked
me
down
over
a
cigarette
out
back.

*sigh*

We
shared
his
last
one.


Even
The Soldier
is
sick
of
the
queen

now.

ihavenothingleft
to
draw
from.

IcannotStopShaking.
IcannotStopWeeping.

MyMind
isGone.

IdoNotRemember
who
I
am.

I
want
to
call
my
Mother....

But
I
have
nothing
to
say.

IamNotSureWhatIsKeeping
myHeadonMyShoulders
anylonger

IcouldCallKym
ButWhatWouldIsay?

IcouldCall
Daniel
but
what
would
I
say?

MyBody
is
VibratingWithFearAndSorrowAndSelfHate.

Stan
Chip
Linda
Debbie
George.

But
what
would
I
say?

HOLDME?
Nothingcanholdmenow.

ThisisMINE.

Ihave
tofind
ahole
out

on
my
own.

ImayCallThePolice.

Comments

Posted by: a (ohchicken)
Posted at: May 20th, 2007 07:15 pm (UTC)

i check in. and this is frightening.

Posted by: Red Lipstick & Green Ink (ginger931)
Posted at: May 20th, 2007 07:18 pm (UTC)
A Basket Case

only
people
who
don't
give
a
shit
about
those
they
leave
behind?

I
am
not
that
Girl.

I
know
what
it
feels
like.

I
don'twanttfeel........

But
Iam
NOT
the
girl
who
would
leave
that
behind
me.

Posted by: a (ohchicken)
Posted at: May 20th, 2007 07:27 pm (UTC)

i wish i understood.
please don't kill yourself.

...you always find a way to live.

Posted by: Red Lipstick & Green Ink (ginger931)
Posted at: May 20th, 2007 07:29 pm (UTC)
*coughingAndlaughing*
Catwoman

tell
Helen
I
wonder
about
my
Title.

FrancesfeelsNaked.

I
need
to
sell
shit
to
get
out
of
HERE.

Posted by: Miss Adventure and Her Friends (snaxxx)
Posted at: May 20th, 2007 08:45 pm (UTC)
Don't make me kick your ass
vinca

Chip is trying to call you, but he doesn't think he has a recent number. Can you PLEASE call him, Daniel, or me ASAP? My digits are 7856813.

You are the keeper of your emotions, but your friends are ALWAYS here for you, even if it's not in a physical presence.

Posted by: Red Lipstick & Green Ink (ginger931)
Posted at: May 20th, 2007 09:03 pm (UTC)
Re: Don't make me kick your ass
Rizzo-Ginger

number
has
been
the
same
for
over
7
years.

I
need
a
good
ass
kicking.

(he called)

Posted by: Daniel (eastland)
Posted at: May 20th, 2007 08:59 pm (UTC)

You don't have to say anything cogent. Just call back, Ginger. Just breathe on the other end of the line.

I'm not out of stories.

Posted by: emily (tugena13)
Posted at: May 21st, 2007 04:17 pm (UTC)

wow. what happened? are you ok? damn distance! i wish i could go check on you right now. please tell me you're ok, sis.

Posted by: Pumping Iron Hearts (woundedmarigold)
Posted at: May 21st, 2007 04:40 pm (UTC)
weeds

The one day I do not check livejournal! I'm sending hope into the void. Gingers and Drozds have to stick together. We need each other in this scary world.

Posted by: Gabrielle (beeswing)
Posted at: May 21st, 2007 08:34 pm (UTC)

Oh Ginger, I'm so sorry I missed this yesterday. Take care of yourself, be well, you beautiful bright spark. Many, many hugs.

Is there anything I can do? Do you want to talk? xx

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