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Red Lipstick & Green Ink [userpic]

Thursday.

September 21st, 2006 (10:04 pm)
current song: (We Can) Live - BoDeans

I am trying not to take things apart detail by detail these days...
Everything needn't be recorded.

I woke up and was productive...I became more productive as the day wore on, and
wore on me. A day off that made my shoulders ache.

Still.
It felt good.

There was something waiting for me at the end of my day.
I would have to work hard for that too, take risks and possibly fail--but
I wanted to do it.

I completed the task. But what I was waiting for never happened.
A week ago....

There would have been screaming fits--possibly plates thrown.

Not now.
Not any more.

I am learning silence.
Not forced silence, not angry silence, not holding-back silence....

Silence.

Quiet inside.
Stillness.

I am learning, that when I can achieve this....I hear things.

I hear things I have been shouting over, crying and pounding my fists over.
I hear what I am only now remembering
brought me
to this
place.

And why I want to be here.

I do want to be here.

Finding Balance every day...between Force of Nature and Control.

Comments

Posted by: barry_barry (barry_barry)
Posted at: September 22nd, 2006 04:04 am (UTC)
chinese bear

From a place of balance, you can move in all directions with the utmost of control. That is the way of nature.

Posted by: Ms Heidi (veritatem)
Posted at: September 22nd, 2006 04:11 am (UTC)
ein

i strive for stillness as well. but don't get too down on myself if a few plates get thrown every once in a while :)

Posted by: Orin (rin_o)
Posted at: September 22nd, 2006 05:41 am (UTC)

that's probably a good step. as long as you know the why of it, i'm sure it'll work out.

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